Wednesday, February 4, 2009

More Humor – Less Love



The Match.com winterfest 09 is into day four and true to form I’m looking at 40 bucks worth of soul crushing comedic material instead of a pocket full of inspiring buds of young love. Still forever optimistic I am certain that within the next 26 days I will DATE… no seriously I will. I am totally “secreting” it.

Throughout this process of on-line dating I am constantly intrigued and amazed by the level of confidence that many men instinctively possess even though their existence balances along the razor’s edge between retarded and pathetic. Damn if I had ¼ of the confidence that these toothless illiterate slobs enjoy I would be unstoppable. Case in point: In my posting it is rather apparent that I’m intelligent, cultured, employed, and dare I say it, sweet on the eyes. Now after reading my brief witty posting and perusing my photos here are the only responses I have received from men who thought, “Hmmm I am SO right for this chick…I really must email her”.


  • I am looking to get married again. I want someone to just be a doll. Someone that knows how to take care of a man without any confrontations

  • I'M A NYC UNION IRON WORKER. SOMETIMES IT CAN SUCK BECAUSE IT IS EXTREMELY HARD AND DANGEROUS BUT THE $ IS GREAT AND I'M EXTREMELY PROUD TO BE A CARDHOLDING MEMBER OF MY UNION.

  • i am very mature men open mind family men like some one for serouis relationship no play around have good heart happy and giving and motivated i like to treat my partner as gentle as lover as queen

  • I am looking for a woman who is: smart likes to watch football believes that half a shirt is still a shirt thinks that a cute outfit can be more important than comfort (ie tight shoe game) doesn't hate on John Madden football believes that FAMU has the best marching band on the planet and ideally wants to spend time with me

I have ignored all of these missives however dear readers if you feel that I am being WAY TOO judgmental please let me know and I will swiftly hit the REPLY button to start the process with one (or more) of these gents. I may be single today but with your help I do not have to be single tomorrow!

1 comment:

Susan said...

please give me the number of the guy who wants a woman who thinks half-shirts are sexy. I'm so excited to find my match in the world!!

Also, props for ending the entry with your old "subway panhandling" closing line. I love it.