Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Gobble Gobble


I’m here at Hydra on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving watching the clock click down to our early dismissal; eating a cupcake and listening to Effie belt out her heart… oh Effie that man done did you wrong. My first call of the day today was from a drone asking me if tonight was Thanksgiving? He was on his way to work and realized that he may have forgotten to pick up food. I talked him down off the ledge and informed him that since today was ONLY Wednesday it certainly was NOT Thanksgiving. He was relieved. However being a Jew I also reminded him that unlike Jewish holidays there is no Erev Thanksgiving so I understood how he could have made the mistake.

In a few hours I will be making my 3 hour bus journey out East to Mom’s house to celebrate the feast. I do not have high hopes for the next 4 days for if the past is any predictor for the future my Thanksgiving will be filled with disappointment, uncomfortable silences, and hours of “alone time”. Scooter has assured me that an open invitation exists at his abode so if I need to make a speedy escape he will welcome me into his hearth and home… thanks Scooter.
Whether or not this Thanksgiving tanks I am certain however that my family will once again participate in their favorite tradition entitled – “No G, YOUR favorite pie is LEMON!” This tradition began many years ago while I was away at college and has really never lost its charm….for others. Every Thanksgiving, prior to my arrival back at the homestead, my Mother would ask my brother what pies she should buy. My brother being the golden child would request his favorite pie – lemon- but not for himself (of course) but because as he would tell my mother it was MY favorite pie. My mother never one to question my brother or remember my likes (or dislikes) would consistently purchase one Lemon Pie and one Mince (her pie of choice) then report at dinner “Ohh Gee save room for dessert I bought something VERY special JUST for you!” Ohhhh wow fantastic… because not only was it Thanksgiving it was also my Birthday so it must be something really terrific….like APPLE PIE!!!! But every year, like the year before the woman spurned me when a huge Lemon Pie would be presented on the table with the words, “Look G, your favorite…. Lemon Pie”. The tradition would then continue with me answering, “No that is your SON’S favorite pie. Mine, as always, is apple.” My brother would then chime in with “Why do you have to make everything so difficult? Why do you have to ruin every nice thing Mom does for you? Just eat the Lemon Pie, ughhhhhhh!!!”

So the tradition was born and we reenact it to this day with additions like, “There weren’t any apple pies at the store”, “If it is so important why not bring your own pie”, “You know I have to remember so many other things. Can’t you just give me a break on the apple pie”….etc…. Other years have brought major surprises like the homemade pie that was delivered special just for me by a well meaning family friend. Too bad it wasn’t really pie (it was missing a crust) and it was filled with many fruits none of which even resembled an apple. However to my surprise it was chock a block with strawberries which sent me to the ER room on Thanksgiving night as my brain swelled and pressed against my scull (side note I am deathly allergic to strawberries).

So kids have a great Thanksgiving and if you get served Apple Pie consider yourself lucky.

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